“mood” is basically the equivalent of “amen”
and now I am picturing an entire congregation solemnly intoning “big mood”
“May the Lord be with you.”
“Bitch you too the fuck!”
I threw a dog on the ground today 😭😭😭
I am embarrassed by how hard this made me laugh.
…..does this mean cat people hurl cats at the ground?
you just kind of… open ur arms and they sort themselves out. if you try and place them down they get mad and wiggle and make everything worse
some friends of mine have the most un-cat-ish cat i have ever met
my quintessential example of this:
i was holding him in my arms petting him while we were picking out what games to play that night. when we’d decided on a few, i needed to put the cat down in order to, you know, carry boxes. so i started letting him down, expecting that he’d eventually do the cat hop thing… but he never did.
i ended up lowering him all the way to the floor. and even then he never got his feet under him. i just sort of… plopped him down on his side as he stared up at me like a betrayed sack of flour.
I saw this so clearly in my mind and I’m never going to stop laughing at betrayed sack of flour.
reblogging for betrayed sack of flour.
Did someone violate my cranberries
If I could just get nutrients fucked into me that would make life way easier.
gettin that Vitamin D kno what im sayin
the last thing john mulaney said in his standup at radio city was “one time my dad lifted me up by the shirt during church and said ‘GOD CAN’T HEAR YOU.’ thank you new york goodnight” and thats the funniest thing in the entire standup
Gay culture is regretting not being gay sooner and being upset at all those gay years wasted
*turns down my graphics settings irl so i get better mental performance and can run faster*
apparently food inspections stopped bc of the shutdown so things bout to be real fucked up for some of us